


The Color Of You

by Jikookblues



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Mark is blind, Roommates to lovers, also side norenmin, color soulmates, hyuck is a brat but a caring brat, i can't think of any more tags but i will add them as i go, jaehyun and jeno play soccer together, johnny is the older brother that's not related to anyone, markhyuck, oh there won't be much angst, okay so maybe there will be some angst lol, teayong and mark are brothers, there might be a little but i promise there is barley any, they will literally be the death of me oof
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-01-27 13:00:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21392563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jikookblues/pseuds/Jikookblues
Summary: It's common knowledge that when you lock eyes with your soulmate color blooms from their heart and spreads like wildfire throughout your world. But what happens when that’s not possible? What are you supposed to do when you’ve lived your whole life not even being able to see the grays of the world around you? You give up, that’s what. You give up any chance of ever finding a soulmate and come to terms with the fact that your world will never be as colorful as those around you. Hell, you can’t even see. Why do you need color anyways? Or at least that’s what Mark Lee tells himself every morning as he gets ready to face the world that already seems to be throwing everything they have against him.Or, Mark Lee is blind in a world where you see color when you meet your soulmate, but still manages to find brightness in his life when he meets his new roommate Lee Donghyuck.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Lee Taeyong/Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten
Comments: 20
Kudos: 116





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is something I started a few months ago that I just got around to working on again. Please be patient while I work on the other chapters, I promise they're coming eventually. I didn't read over this lol cause it was really late when I finished so please ignore any mistakes. Thanks for reading! :)

Soulmates exist.

They are very real and very important. At least to most people.

There are myths that a long time ago, people were born connected—with four arms and four legs and two heads and one heart. But when a jealous god became angry, he ripped them apart and scattered them across Earth. These humans were left alone with half a heart, living out the rest of their days searching for their other half. Now, it was common knowledge that when you came into contact with your other half, color would bloom from their heart and spread like wildfire across your world until all you could see was each other. People talked about it as if it was the most magical thing they had ever experienced—getting to see color for the first time. They longed to meet their other half, their partner in crime, their happiness on a cloudy day.

But none of this mattered to Mark. How could it? Everyone else around him lived a life full of muddled grays and shades of hope with the promise that one day it would change. While Mark couldn’t see anything at all. To be fair, he wasn’t completely blind. He could still see some lights and shadows—especially when something extra shiny was in front of him—but he would never be able to see colors the way others described them. Hell, he couldn’t even see himself, let alone someone that’s supposed to change his world forever.

He was much happier to spend his time focussing on things that did matter. Like school. And his music. And the big bowl of watermelon sherbet that was currently sitting on his lap in front of him. But the world never let him enjoy things too much because after only two spoonfuls of the refreshing treat, something comes flying through the front door of his apartment. And Mark says ’something’ because he can’t actually tell if it’s a person or not. It’s loud and obnoxious and unlike anything he’s ever heard before. He startles and faces towards where the noise came from and all he can see is a blob of shadows. He assumes it’s a person but can’t be 100 percent certain, especially in the shocked state that he’s in.

He quickly runs through his mental list of people that would just show up to his apartment to determine whether he needs to call them an idiot or call the police. He can cross off Jeno and Jaehyun because he knows that they have soccer practice every Thursday. And it wouldn’t be Johnny because he always calls first to let Mark know he should start their take out order. The only other person it could be is his brother Taeyong but he’s spending the week in Thailand with his boyfriend Ten’s family. That leaves only one possibility left.

Someone is here to murder him.

After his brief pause of shock, Mark moves into action. He quickly feels around the side of the couch for the baseball bat that Johnny insists he keeps there in case someone ever brakes in—which Mark really should thank him for now that he thinks about it—and stands up into a defensive position facing towards the door. “Whoever you are, you better leave right now! My friend is supposed to be here any minute and he’ll beat you up so bad if he finds a stranger here,” Mark yells with barely enough confidence to even convince himself.

“Dude, I’m over here. Why are you yelling at the door?” comes a melodic voice from behind his right shoulder, near where the kitchen entryway is.

Mark twists towards the voice, keeping the bat raised, and his eyes closed firmly, “Who are you and what do you want?”

“Well I want some help carrying all of this stuff, if it’s not too much to ask, but you don’t seem that welcoming at the moment,” the stranger states flatly.

“What do you mean you want help? With what stuff,” Mark exclaims, stumbling over his words from both his shaky voice and his shaky heart. He can’t remember the last time his heart rate got up this high, actually. Mark was used to people showing up out of nowhere or grabbing his shoulder from behind—it was a casualty of his disability—but he definitely wasn’t used to this. He had never had anyone show up at his apartment and brake in before.

The stranger let out a frustrated huff, “Wow you must be slow or something. Jeno told me you were a little strange but he never mentioned that you were stupid as well.”

The mention of Jeno threw mark for a loop. Lowering the bat slightly he asked, “Wait, you know Jeno? Did he send you?”

“Now we’re getting somewhere,” the stranger sighed, “I’m Jeno’s friend, Lee Donghyuck? I’m moving into the spare room here for the upcoming semester? Jeno gave me the key a few days ago? Tell me if any of this is sounding familiar.”

Mark pauses for a minute to think. Jeno had mentioned something to him a few weeks ago about a friend of his moving into Mark’s vacant spare room that Taeyong had just moved out of. Teayong didn’t like the thought of leaving Mark to live on his own but was at the point in his relationship with Ten that they wanted to start settling down—thus beginning the annoying task of Mark finding a roommate. He hadn’t had much success—probably because he wasn’t really looking—until Jeno had approached him about his friend. Mark loathed the idea of having a roommate, of having to meet new people in general, and having to feel their sympathy when they found out he was blind and then their pity when they realized what that meant for him soulmate wise. He didn’t want to have to go through that again, especially when he would have to live with that person for who knows how long. But to appease Teayong and to stop his friends from constantly worrying about him he finally agreed to getting a roommate. Mark figured that if the boy was Jeno’s friend, he couldn’t be that bad of a roommate. He figured he would probably be just as sweet and soft-spoken as Jeno. But when Mark had finally agreed to the living situation, they had scheduled the move-in day for Sunday.

Mark lowers the baseball bat the rest of the way so that it was resting by his side, “Oh… I thought that you were supposed to move in this weekend. I wasn’t expecting you to be here today.”

“Well something came up and I needed to move in today instead. I texted you about it and assumed when you left me on read it was fine,” Donghyuck responds.

“Oh sorry,” Mark apologizes, “I must have left the chat open on accident while I was eating."

“Well is this going to be a problem? Because I kind of already have all of my stuff waiting downstairs.”

“No, no that’s fine,” Mark quickly responds, stepping forward out of surprise. “Did you want me to call Johnny or Jeno over to help you with the boxes?”

“I mean, if you’re that adamant about not helping me carry stuff then go ahead,” Donghyuck retorts. He sees the boy stiffen in response and Donghyuck is more confused than ever. Either this boy just really hates to carry things or he has a problem with Donghyuck. And in Donghyuck’s experience, it’s most likely the latter. Not to mention the fact that Mark has had his eyes closed during their entire conversation—which is extremely stupid if he thinks that Donghyuck had broken in. “And while we’re on it, do you have a problem with me?”

Mark is taken aback by that, “No… why would you think that?”

“Well we’ve been talking for a good twenty minutes now and the entire time you’ve had your eyes closed. And it doesn’t look like you’re planning on opening them anytime soon,” Donghyuck says with more attitude than he had meant too.

Mark’s jaw clenches and his grip on the baseball bat tightens. He lets out a deep breath and slowly opens his eyes, looks at the ground, and whispers so quietly he’s not sure that Donghyuck can hear him, “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that I was being rude.”

The minute Donghyuck sees Mark’s eyes, he gasps. They are dark and deep and unlike anything he’s ever seen. Donghyuck knows about soulmates—you can’t grow up in their world and not know about them—but he never expected meeting his would be like this. Wasn’t the whole world supposed to explode with color the moment you saw them? Wasn’t there supposed to be… more? More color? More life? More feelings? More... something? Not this mundane meeting with only one thing to give him any indication that they were soulmates. Donghyuck wasn’t even sure that they were. Yes, Mark’s eyes were something he’d never seen, but that could just be the light, right? They could pass off as black, couldn't they? But the more that Donghyuck looked at him, the more he was sure that they were, in fact, a color that he had never seen before.

But they were also covered with a thin layer of haze. Mark was looking towards the ground but Donghyuck could tell that he wasn’t focused on it, almost as if he couldn’t see it. Donghyuck’s own eyes widened as he realized the situation.

Mark was blind.

And Donghyuck’s soulmate.

But he would never know. Unless Mark miraculously managed to be able to see grays and blacks and whites in the next few seconds, he would never know that Donghyuck was his soulmate. 

“Your eyes…” he whispered in the same soft tone that Mark had just used.

“Yeah, I know they can take getting used too,” Mark says, reaching up with his free hand to rub the back of his neck uncomfortably. “Teayong tells me that they can be a little unsettling at first but that people get over it pretty easily. I don’t know if I believe him but, yeah, it’s not like I can tell anyways,” he chuckles nervously.

“You’re blind,” Donghyuck simply states, still trying to wrap his head around the sudden realization that his new roommate is his one-sided soulmate.

"Ye-yeah, I hope that’s not a problem,” Mark begins to ramble. “I thought that Jeno would have mentioned it before you, like, accepted the offer to move in but I guess they didn’t. I totally get it if you don’t want to move in anymore but I promise that you won’t have to, like, take care of me or anything. I’ve been like this my whole life so I’m pretty self-sufficient. I can, like, get around just fine and even, like, cook and stuff. Well, not cook cause I’m absolute trash at that, but I can make a mean sandwich….” Mark trails off once he realizes that Donghyuck probably doesn’t care if he can cook or whether or not he knows how to make a sandwich. “But yeah, I hope this doesn’t change anything.”

“No that’s not-“ Donghyuck stops himself. He wants to tell Mark that he wasn’t even talking about him being blind. That he didn’t care that he couldn’t see. That he was more curious about how in the hell he was supposed to have a soulmate that didn’t know he was his soulmate. That Donghyuck could see the deep color of his eyes and that if he stepped closer, he could probably see all of the different shades and mixtures that made up Mark Lee’s soul. But for some reason, he stopped himself. For some reason, he just couldn’t say it. Maybe because they had only met a few minutes ago or maybe because Donghyuck still couldn’t believe that this was happening, but he chose to stay quiet for now.

“That’s not what?” Mark asked after Donghyuck hadn’t said anything for a few moments.

Donghyuck needed to pull himself together. “That’s not a problem. Anyplace is better than where I was staying before and I don’t care that you’re blind. It’s not a huge deal.”

“Oh, okay, yeah, that’s good,” Mark says hurriedly. The whole time since he had opened his eyes, he had been looking towards the ground because he was afraid of how Donghyuck would react to his disability. Not everyone was as kind about it as his brother and their friends. Hell, he was bullied so much for it in school that he was just always expecting the worst. But Donghyuck’s words seemed genuine and when Mark released the breath that he didn’t know he was holding, he felt lighter.

“Now where’s my room,” Donghyuck asked with a hint of the same sass as before.

Mark couldn’t help but assume that Donghyuck’s very state of being was filled with more sass than should be necessary for any situation. But for some reason, it didn’t bother Mark as much as it should. At this question though, Mark points down the hallway towards the back of the apartment, “It’s the second door on the left, right across from the bathroom. The first door is the hallway closet where we usually keep extra blankets and pillows. And my room is the one at the end of the hall. Taeyong moved out over a week ago so everything should be ready for you, but if you happen to find something that he missed, you can just put it on the dining room table. He’ll probably stop by when he gets back from Thailand to check on me so he can get them then.” Mark rolls his eyes at the last remark. He loved Taeyong but sometimes he was too overprotective.

“Okay, thanks. I’ll make sure to do that,” Donghyuck states. “And don’t bother your friends, I was just being dramatic earlier. I don’t actually have that much stuff to carry.” And with that, Donghyuck turned to take his first set of bags to his new room. But before he could make it to the hallway, Mark stopped him.

“Let me know if you need anything Donghyuck. I look forward to getting to know you.”

The kindness that flowed off of Mark took Donghyuck by surprise. It was a complete 180 from the start of their conversation but Donghyuck couldn’t say that he wasn’t pleased. He smiled softly and responded, “Same here.”

Even with all of the attitude and confidence that Donghyuck had exuded, Mark could tell that he meant it. The softness in his voice melted the last of the hesitancy that Mark had felt towards the other boy, so he finally raised his head to look in his general direction. Except to his surprise, the world wasn’t dark anymore. It was bright and dazzling and unlike anything he had ever experienced. It was as if light was dancing off of Donghyuck like he was the sun, or at the very least covered in an exuberant amount of glitter. Mark couldn’t say for certain, but it was like he could see Donghyuck’s eyes, or where they were supposed to be. But before he had time to fully process it, Donghyuck was turning away again, heading down the hallway towards what was now his room.

Mark has never been one to believe in soulmates, but Donghyuck made him question himself. What else could be the reason for that amount of light? Cause it certainly wasn’t his imagination and it certainly wasn’t the gods. So the only other semi-plausible explanation could be... soulmates.

But, if Donghyuck was his soulmate then… why hadn’t he said anything?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter; I hope you like it! As always, I didn't edit it so please excuse any mistakes. I updated chapter one earlier today and changed it a little so be sure to reread it! I'll probably end up editing ch.2 in a few days as well so look out for that update too!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter for updates on new chapters: @markhyuckblues (previously @jikookblues - someone else uses this username now)

“Oof, finally,” Donghyuck exclaims, as he sets the last of his boxes on the ground in his new room. He wasn’t lying earlier when he had told Mark that there weren’t that many—there were only five or six—but Donghyuck was in such a rush to pack all of his belongings, and finally get away from his parents, that he had ended up throwing anything within his reach into them. This made them just heavy enough to have to carry them individually up the three flights of stairs to the apartment. He wasn’t even sure of everything that he had brought. He was just hoping that he had remembered to grab his Red Velvet photocard collection or else he would have to make a very unwanted trip back to his parent’s estate, and he definitely wanted to avoid that at all costs. Especially after the big scene he had made while leaving.

Donghyuck took a seat on the twin-sized bed so that he could catch his breath. He looked around the foreign room with its blank white walls, taking in his new surroundings. It was decently sized, smaller than what he was used to but not so small that it felt cramped. The bed sat in the back corner on the right side of the room, a small bedside table next to it. There was a desk with a chair tucked into it on the opposite wall next to the closet. The walls were bare and it felt like what Donghyuck expected a dorm room to feel like—cold and strange and not like home. But it was still better than his old situation so he wasn’t going to complain.

It had been about an hour since he had left Mark and their strange conversation in the living room and he was itching to see him again. Or, to see his eyes again. Donghyuck wanted to make sure that he really had seen them right, that he wasn’t just imagining the color within them. He wasn’t even sure what name to give it, but from what he had read about in school it looked a lot like what he imagined brown or purple to be—deep and dark and warm. But purple didn’t seem right. That felt too vibrant and out of place. And if he'd learned anything in biology, it was that purple wasn’t a typical color for eyes, so it had to be brown. Yes, brown sounded right. But the more Donghyuck thought about it, the more he wanted to see the color for himself. To explore it up close. He had spent the last hour, while he was carrying the boxes from the lobby of the building up to his room, trying to see any other hint of color, any fleck of dust that wasn’t the usual dull gray that he was used to. But he had no such luck. The world was the same as it always has been—boring.

After a few moments of sitting there, Donghyuck's breathing began to even and his heart rate returned to normal. He stood up to get a glass of water from the kitchen before he started the tiresome task of unpacking his mystery boxes, figuring that he should just get it done with before school started back up in four days. He exited the room, walked down the now familiar hallway, and paused in the entrance to the living room but kept moving when he didn’t see Mark sitting on the couch like he had been the entire time Donghyuck was bringing up his things. “I wonder where-“ Donghyuck starts to say as he rounds the corner into the kitchen, but he stops when he comes face to face with Mark. And, more importantly, face to face with Mark’s eyes. Unfocused as they were, they pulled Donghyuck in and wrapped him in the warmth of a summer bonfire. There was no getting around the soulmate thing. Mark’s eyes were definitely brown, Donghyuck had no doubt about that anymore. “Aaah, I didn’t see you there.” 

“Oh sorry,” Mark apologizes, unable to look away from the dazzling lights coming off of his new roommate, “I was just going to bring you some water cause you sounded tired from bringing the boxes up.” Mark's voice wavered from the pathetic excuse and he hoped that Donghyuck wouldn't notice how nervous the bright boy made him. 

“You didn’t have to do that. I can get my own water,” Donghyuck says with more bite than he intended. When he notices a flash of disappointment cross Mark's face, though, he quickly adds, “But thank you.”

Donghyuck takes the cup that Mark was holding and their hands momentarily touch. They both stand there, staring at each other for what feels like an eternity but for what is probably only a few seconds. They can’t take their eyes off of each other and are swept up in the newfound sight that they’ve both gained in the last hour. This new change to their world is minuscule in relation to the myths but it knocks them off guard just enough for them to loosen their grasps on reality. And although their hearts may feel warm from the unexpected surprise, the air is thin. And Donghyuck feels like he can’t breathe. Like he needs to get out. So he does. He backs up until he can feel the couch on his hip and then starts to make his way towards the front door. He makes it to the entryway before he realizes he’s still holding the cup of water so he set’s it on the table by the door next to the bowl with their keys. As he starts to put his shoes on he manages to get out, “S-sorry, umm, I ha-have to go, umm, meet my friend for dinner. I’ll be back later.” And then he’s out the door without a second glance.

Mark is still standing in the kitchen where Donghyuck had left him, confused and a little worried. He didn’t understand what just happened. Maybe that’s just how Donghyuck is normally, but something tells Mark that it’s not. That something is wrong. And that it’s his fault. He frowns down at his hand that was holding the cup. The hand that Donghyuck had brushed when he grabbed the drink with his own. It was still as shadowy as ever, the only exception being the light that reflected off the Apple Watch on his wrist. Mark thinks that he should probably text Donghyuck to see if he’s alright, but he doesn’t want to make it worse. If they really were soulmates, then he knows that Donghyuck would be able to tell immediately. The fact that he hasn’t brought it up yet makes Mark think that he doesn’t like him, or worse, that he’s upset he has a soulmate that’s blind. Mark’s worry is suddenly replaced with dread. He really hopes that that’s not the case, but he’s learned over the years not to expect much from the people around him. The thing is though, as uneasy as he feels, he still thinks he should check on him. As much shit as he gives Taeyong for being overprotective, Mark is the same way. He cares deeply about his friends and is always looking out for them. And even though he barely knows Donghyuck yet, he still feels some sort of responsibility for the boy that is supposed to be living under his roof. The boy that may or may not be his soulmate. So against his better judgment, Mark raises his watch and says, “Hey Siri, text Donghyuck.”

“What do you want to say?” the robotic, female voice responds.

“Hey sorry about earlier. Hope you have a good time with your friend. Be safe on your way back.”

“Your message to Lee Donghyuck (roommate) says, ‘Hey sorry about earlier. Hope you have a good time with your friend. Be safe on your way back.’ Ready to send it?”

“Yes,” Mark confirms.

“Okay. It’s sent."

Marks lets out a frustrated breath. He can’t help but think that if this is how living with Donghyuck is going to be, there were going to be a lot more moments like this in the future. He had been itching to see Donghyuck since their conversation had ended earlier that day. Mark knew that living with him meant that he would see Donghyuck eventually but Mark was never known to be patient. After an hour of sitting on the couch, waiting—his watermelon sherbet long since melted and forgotten—he had come up with the brilliant plan to give Donghyuck some water. It was a feeble attempt at getting to see him, but Mark was getting antsy just sitting there in the living room, especially when he could hear Donghyuck breathing heavy from carrying all of his boxes up to the apartment. From the struggle that could be heard from the other boy, Mark guessed that the elevator had probably broken down again. This had made Mark feel even worse because he knew that he would have just caused more problems for Donghyuck if he had tried to help. But here he is—alone again—and he still can’t get Donghyuck off his mind.

—

The minute Donghyuck is out of the apartment he texts his group chat with Renjun and Jaemin. He needs an emergency ice cream date and he needs it now. The day had been more stressful than usual. From the huge fight with his parents in the morning and them basically kicking him out, to then finding out that his new roommate is his soulmate, Donghyuck just wants to sit down and cry out all of his frustrations. But he knows that wasn’t going to solve anything and that it would only result in making his face puffy and gross. So he was settling for the next best thing: an emergency date with his best friends. They call them emergency dates because the three tend to attract unanticipated drama at all times of the day, causing the need for comfort when they least expected it. The three of them had known each other their whole lives. They grew up together and have faced all of life’s hardships while supporting each other. They didn’t have secrets. They knew everything about each other—the good, the bad, and the ugly. That’s why Donghyuck knew that when he texted them to meet up, both of them would come running to his side, to hold his hand and rub his back and tell him it was going to be okay.

When Donghyuck walked into the ice cream parlor, he went straight to the back corner that had become their spot over the many years that the three boys had been going there. Renjun and Jaemin were both sitting there chatting when Donghyuck walked up to the booth.

Jaemin takes one look at him and immediately gives him grabby hands, “Aww Hyuckie, come here. What’s wrong?”

Donghyuck hesitates. He thought he was okay, just a little overwhelmed, but the minute he sees the concern on Jaemin's face, his eyes start to water and his throat gets all dry.

Renjun stands up so that Donghyuck can slide in between them. “We already ordered your favorite, so just sit down and tell us what’s wrong so Nana will stop worrying,” he says in his usual Renjun fashion, but Donghyuck has known him long enough to be able to hear the concern layered underneath.

“Okay. Okay,” Donghyuck says with as much sass as he can muster at the moment, which isn't much at all he's realizing. He sits down and is immediately embraced by Jaemin. Once Renjun sits back down again, he takes Donghyuck’s hand and squeezes it tight. Donghyuck lets out a shaky breath; this is exactly what he needed. “Thanks for meeting me,” he says softly to the two boys sitting beside him. He glances at both of them, silently asking for comfort.

Jaemin squeezes him tighter, “Please tell us what’s wrong. Is it your parents?”

Renjun gives Jaemin a sharp look. Jaemin should know that Hyuck’s parents are a sensitive topic.

But Donghyuck doesn’t even falter at the question. “No. Yes. I don’t know,” he starts off, “Today has just been a lot.”

“Well hey, at least you finally got out of there right? And you don’t have any reason to ever go back,” Renjun says protectively.

“Yeah, I guess. But that’s not even the problem.”

"Then what's wrong?" Renjun asks at the same time Jaemin starts in with his millions of questions and overprotective concern.

“You moved into that guy’s spare room today, didn’t you? Was he there? Did he do something to you?” Jaemin asks, getting louder and more heated with each question.

Donghyuck uses the hand that’s not clinging onto Renjun to pat Jaemin’s thigh. “Don’t worry, it was nothing like that. He’s actually kind of nice. It’s just that-“ Donghyuck pauses. He doesn’t know if he should tell them. If his parents were a sensitive topic for Donghyuck, then soulmates were a sensitive topic for his two best friends. Donghyuck already feels stupid for overreacting this much and he doesn't know if he should bother his friends with this. It really wasn’t a big deal. But then, why was he so upset about it?

“It’s okay, Hyuck. You don’t have to tell us right now if you’re not ready,” Renjun says softly. “We can just sit here and eat ice cream if you want to.”

Jaemin nods in agreement, “Yeah, we can just talk about school or boys or music. Whatever you want.”

Donghyuck smiles. He loves his best friends so much. They understood him like no one else. Sometimes he wishes that they were just his soulmates so that he didn’t have to deal with this mess. But they already had each other and Donghyuck never wanted to intrude on that. After he thinks about the offer for a moment, he decides that it's better to be honest with the two people he trusts most in the world. “Can I ask you guys a question?”

“Yeah of course,” Jaemin states.

“Always,” Renjun assures.

“I know it was a long time ago, but what was it like for you two when you realized you were soulmates?” Donghyuck asks shyly.

This wasn’t a topic that they talked about very often because although Renjun and Jaemin were soulmates, they weren’t romantically involved. Neither of them had felt that it was needed yet, and they didn’t want to ruin the trust and friendship they had built up over so many years, with awkward physical interactions and romantic gestures. They were content with how their relationship had evolved and they didn’t feel a need or push to take it further.

The two boys glanced at each other and smiled softly. “Well,” Jaemin started, “I think it’s a little different for us because we met so young. We didn’t even realize what it meant when we started to see colors. It wasn’t until we started grade school that we figured it out, and by that point, we were already friends.”

“Yeah, and neither of us had really lived very long with only the grays so the color wasn’t that big of a surprise. I actually don’t even remember a time where I didn’t see at least some color,” Renjun adds on truthfully.

“Was it a huge burst of colors, like they talk about in the myths? Or was it more of a slow progression until you could see all of the colors?”

“I think for both of us it was a slow progression. I’m not even sure we can see all of the colors yet,” Jaemin answered hesitantly while looking at Renjun for support.

This confuses Donghyuck. “What do you mean you can’t see all of the colors?” he asks, looking back and forth between the boys for an answer.

“It means exactly that, Hyuck,” Renjun answers. “Yes we can see a lot of different colors, but, I don’t really know how to describe it. It feels like there’s something missing.”

“Like there are pieces that haven’t filled in yet,” Jaemin confirms.

“It was kind of weird,” Renjun continues, “As we grew closer and learned more about each other, more colors started to appear. But they seem to have stopped recently.”

"And they don’t seem as vibrant or as deep as they should be. Or at least how they describe them at school,” Jaemin adds on.

“Do you think that means something?” Donghyuck asks them.

The two boys exchange another look. “We're not sure yet. But we’re just taking it a day at a time,” Renjun decides. “We’ll figure it out eventually, so we don’t need to panic about it right now."

Donghyuck doesn’t look convinced.

Jaemin rubs Donghyuck’s arm to comfort him, “Why do you ask, Hyuckie? Do you think you may have met your soulmate?”

Donghyuck’s eyes start to water again, “Yeah and that’s the problem.” He takes a deep breath to prepare for what he’s going to say next, “My soulmate is blind.”

Jaemin’s hand stills on Donghyuck’s arm and Renjun's eyes go wide.

“What do you mean your soulmate is blind?” Renjun asks carefully.

“I mean that my soulmate is blind!” Donghyuck exclaims. “He can’t see me, he can’t see anything, and he most certainly can’t see color. How the hell is he supposed to know he’s my soulmate if the world doesn’t fucking light up with color when he looks at me! He can’t even look at me!” Donghyuck’s tears are officially rolling down his face and he just knows that he’s going to have a headache later that night from crying and yelling.

“Aww Hyuckie, it’s probably not as bad as you think,” Jaemin says softly, attempting to calm the boy down. “Did you talk to him about it? He may be able to tell in a different way.”

“No, I just ran out of the apartment when I realized it,” Donghyuck says dejectedly. “It just got to be too much and I couldn’t handle it anymore. That’s when I messaged you guys.”

“Hyuck, you can’t just assume that he can’t tell you're his soulmate just because he’s blind,” Renjun says firmly. The look on his face turning serious. “Did you even ask him how severe his condition was or did you just see his eyes and immediately think the worst?”

Donghyuck shrinks into Jaemin, ashamed at his reaction and lack of consideration. He had never even thought that Mark may be able to tell in a different way. He had just jumped to conclusions like he always does and assumed that Mark was just oblivious. Now that he thinks about it, that was really judgmental of him. He pouts and looks at Renjun, “I didn’t even think of that. Now I feel stupid for running out on him. But to be fair, they never talk about this type of situation in school."

“It’s okay Hyuck. You’re allowed to feel overwhelmed. It’s a big deal to meet your soulmate so I get why you acted like that,” Renjun says. “Just make sure you talk to him next time you see him. And let him explain his side. Don’t run away next time it gets hard.”

“But if you do need to run away,” Jaemin interjects with a smile, “make sure it’s straight to us.”

“Thanks, guys. I feel a lot better now,” Donghyuck says and he realizes that it’s true. His chest no longer feels tight and he finally feels like he can breathe. They always know exactly what to say to make Donghyuck feel better, and if there’s nothing to say, they know exactly how to comfort him.

Donghyuck makes up his mind that he’s going to talk with Mark when he gets home. If they were going to live together, then they needed to be upfront with each other and work out any misunderstandings before they got out of control. He pulls the banana milkshake that was waiting for him closer towards him on the table and takes a sip. But maybe he would sit here and enjoy the time with his friends a little bit longer.

“Wait!” Jaemin exclaims after a few minutes had passed.

Both of the boys look at him with wide eyes and confused faces. “What?” they both ask.

Jaemin makes an exasperated sound. “Did you say that you ran out of the apartment when you realized who your soulmate was?”

Donghyuck nods, still confused.

Jaemin looks at Renjun for confirmation but Renjun has no idea what the honey brown-haired boy is on about.

Jaemin makes another exasperated sigh. “Does this mean that your soulmate is your new roommate?” he asks impatiently.

“Oh. Yeah,” Donghyuck states simply. “Did I forget to mention that?”

Both the boys look at him, look at each other, and then look back at him. “Yeah!” they both exclaim, diving at Donghyuck to get as many details about the boy as they could.

As they start to ask a million questions and tickle him as punishment, Donghyuck thinks to himself, _this is gonna be a long night._ After about 30 questions, Donghyuck feels the phone is his back pocket vibrate. He wonders who that could be; nobody else would text him besides Jaemin and Renjun. And Donghyuck couldn’t help but hope that maybe, just maybe, it was the boy that seemed to be taking over his world without his permission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter for updates on new chapters: @Jikookblues


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, look at that, I'm back after more than a year! A comment made me do it, to be honest. 
> 
> Sorry, this is such a short one! I wrote chapter 4 first and just needed to get us from 2 to 4 lol That being said, chapter 4 will be out in a few days!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter for updates on new chapters: @markhyuckblues (previously @jikookblues - someone else uses this username now)

After a few hours of interrogation from his friends, Donghyuck made his way back to the apartment. It was pretty late so he wasn’t sure if Mark would be up or not, but the closer he got to the building, the more nervous he became. At the diner, he had resolved to talk to Mark about the whole soulmate situation, but now that it was getting more real, he didn’t know if he had the nerve to. What if Mark really couldn’t tell, what if Mark didn’t care - or worse, what if Mark was already in a relationship?

The what-ifs were too much to handle and Hyuck could feel a headache coming on from crying earlier so as he made his way into his new home, he moved ever so quietly so as not to disturb the other boy. He was hoping that Mark wouldn’t notice him sneaking in because he really didn’t want to exert any more effort for the day. But as he opened the door and stepped through the doorframe, the apartment was dark - the only light coming from a nightlight in the kitchen. Donghyuck let out a sigh of relief. Mark must have already gone to bed for the night. He could worry about this issue tomorrow, for now, he was just going to get used to this strange apartment and celebrate the fact that he was free. Free from his controlling parents, from his strict lifestyle, from the expectations of everyone around him. He was finally free to be himself and do what he wanted. With the excitement bubbling up, he stepped into his room, took one look at the boxes, and got started turning his drab new room into a safe space with a Pinterest aesthetic. 

—

It was nearly two in the morning when Hyuck finally sat down to take a break. He had just finished hot gluing leaves to his fairly lights and they were now hanging above his bed like a headboard. He had also spent a good chunk of time setting up his desk - placing his laptop and speakers and microphone in the perfect positions! They were set up for recording but were just out of the way that the desk was still functioning. Being a music major meant that most of his homework involved music theory, writing, and recording so he was happy to finally have a permanent set-up that he didn’t have to hide from visitors or nosy parents. 

The only thing left to do was order a bookshelf for all of his albums and records. That could wait until tomorrow though - especially since nothing was open this late and he was exhausted from the long-ass day he just went through. He hadn’t thought of mark for the majority of the night and he was glad to have had the distractions. But now, as he sits on the edge of his new bed, looking at his new room, his mind can’t help but wander. What did Mark think of this whole situation? Would he like Donghyuck’s loud personality? Would he be able to handle the jokes and the sass that he lived and breathed? Would he be okay with Donghyuck staying up late, never doing dishes, and playing music every second of the day?

Mark didn’t know anything about him - usually, this was a comfort to Donghyuck but for some reason, it was making him anxious. He typically kept to himself and didn’t open up to just anyone. The only people that truly knew him were Jaemin and Renjun and he likes it that way. But if Mark was his soulmate then they would have to get to know each other right? But if Mark couldn’t tell and Donghyuck didn’t say anything then he could probably just ignore it. With all the uncertainty floating around his head, his heart didn’t know what to do - he just wanted to hide. 

Donghyuck sighed and looked down at his phone. The message from earlier had in fact been from Mark. It was sweet but also terrifying so he left it unread. Checking the time, he decides that it’s probably best to go to bed and figure everything out tomorrow. Who knows, maybe he’ll wake up and this will all have a dream! Besides school was starting back up in a few days and he would be too busy with group projects and assignments to worry about whether or not his soulmate was actually his soulmate. He didn’t care anyway - he was in charge of his love life and the gods could go fuck themselves for all he cared.

With that thought, Hyuck got up, turned the lights off, and didn’t even bother brushing his teeth before he curled up under his covers and drifted off into sleep.

Future him could deal with it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I was too excited about this chapter and couldn't wait, so here you go!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter for updates on new chapters: @markhyuckblues (previously @jikookblues - someone else uses this username now)

So future Hyuck didn’t deal with it...

“Are we ever gonna talk about it?”

The voice rings in the silence of the apartment that Donghyuck had gotten used to over the past few weeks. He had been avoiding Mark at all costs and Mark seemed to be letting him be. Mark had tried in the beginning to befriend Donghyuck, asking him how his day went when he arrived back at the apartment, offering to order him food when he was getting takeout, greeting him whenever they were in the same room together. But if Donghyuck is being honest, it was all just too much for him. Dealing with the fact that his soulmate would never know who he was, on top of finding out he had a soulmate in general, was too much. Donghyuck was never one to believe in soulmates, living by the rule that you can’t help who you love so who was the universe to have any say in it. 

“Donghyuck,” Mark says gently to get his attention but so as not to scare the other boy away.

“What do mean? There isn’t anything to talk about,” Donghyuck lies through his teeth. He knew that this would happen eventually. That mark would finally bring up Donghyuck avoiding him. Mark was too nice to say anything right away but everyone had a breaking point and this must be his.

Mark lets out a huff from his place on the couch. He had been working on homework when he had heard Donghyuck making his way from his hiding place in his bedroom, to the kitchen. “Well, we could start with why you seem to be avoiding me.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Mark. I haven’t been avoiding you, I’ve just been busy.” Another lie. He had most definitely been avoiding Mark.

“I don’t believe you,” Mark states boldly. He stands up and turns in the direction of Donghyuck, letting the light coming off the boy, guide him. “You leave every time I come into a room, you always lock yourself away in your bedroom when I’m home, and whenever I try to talk to you, you make up some lame excuse to get out of it.”

Donghyuck doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say because Mark is spot on. They still don’t know each other very well so Donghyuck had hoped that Mark just thought that was his personality. But Mark had heard the laughter and the joy coming from behind the closed door of Donghyuck’s room from what he assumed were phone conversations with his friends, so Mark knew that this Donghyuck wasn’t the real one. 

They stand there in silence, both with their heads down, waiting for the other to say something. 

Mark takes a deep breath like he’s stealing himself for something. “I’m sorry for prying. If you don’t want to talk about it that’s okay. It just feels like you hate me but I have no idea why. I never really intended to have a roommate but I was determined to try to be friends with you when you moved in. I can understand if you don’t want that though. I just wish you would tell me why so I can stop overthinking it and stop coming up with these awful scenarios in my head and… and…” Mark trails off. He was rambling. He tended to do that when he was nervous and the other person wasn’t saying anything. Like he felt obligated to fill the silence. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Donghyuck says lamely. His shoulders are hunched and he has his arms wrapped around his own waist in an attempt to make himself smaller. 

This makes Mark mad. He doesn’t get mad very often but something about Donghyuck not even being able to acknowledge it flips a switch somewhere in Mark. He raises his voice without meaning to. “Can you just admit that you have a problem with me?”

“What does it matter to you that I don’t like you?” Hyuck yells back, getting angry himself. “Why do you care if we’re friends? We barely know each other!”

“Because my whole life I’ve lived in darkness but when I look at you it’s like looking at the sun,” Mark exclaims out of frustration. “How am I supposed to just ignore that.”

The room goes silent. Neither of them daring to breathe after Mark’s confession. 

“What do you mean by that?” Hyuck whispers into the silence between them. 

“Exactly what I said Donghyuck,” Mark replies defeatedly, tired from the conversation. “From the moment I laid eyes on you, you’ve shined brighter than any light I’ve ever seen. And I’ve thought about it over and over and over again but the only thing that makes sense is that you’re my…”

“Soulmate.” Donghyuck finishes, barely above a whisper.

Donghyuck can’t believe what’s happening. His mind shuts down and he starts to feel lightheaded. He can’t breathe. The room feels like it’s closing in. His lungs aren’t working right and he’s finding it difficult to stand. He puts his fist to his too-tight chest, feeling his heart beating way too fast. He lets out a strangled sound in between his hyperventilating, bending forward in pain. 

And Mark is over the couch and by his side in seconds, hands hovering just over Donghyuck’s shoulder. “Donghyuck are you okay?”

There’s no response.

“Donghyuck I think you’re having a panic attack. Just breath. You need to breathe.” His hands finally land and he gently squeezes the boy's shoulders in an attempt to comfort him. “Just listen to my voice and breathe when I tell you to, okay? In… and out… Good again. In… and out… That’s better Donghyuck. In… and out… Can you say it with me this time? In… and out…”

With Mark’s help, Donghyuck slowly starts to calm down. First, his breathing starts to even out, then his heart rate slows. Finally, the pounding in his head starts to lessen. The whole time, Mark is muttering encouragement next to him, voice low and even, stable enough for Donghyuck to focus on. When the attack has finally passed and Donghyuck is feeling like his lungs are finally doing their job, he notices the hand rubbing soothing circles on his back and the fingers entangled with his. He doesn’t know when they started holding hands but the weight of the taller boy’s touch feels like an anchor holding him in place so he can’t float away. The warmth feels nice, but foreign at the same time. Donghyuck had never held anyone’s hand other than Jaemin and Renjun's. His best friends were his only form of physical affection growing up and it felt strange to find comfort in someone that wasn’t them.

Mark stood them both up from their kneeling position on the ground and walked them towards the couch, only letting go of Donghyuck's hand once he was sitting down so that he could go to the kitchen to grab him some water. Once he’s back, he sits beside Donghyuck, reaches out to feel for his hands that are clasped in his lap, and place the glass of water in them. “Here drink this. It will make you feel better.”

Donghyuck looks up at the boy seated next to him. Mark’s brows are furrowed in worry and his mouth is downcast in a frown. When he reaches his eyes, they are as colorful as ever, the light from the lamp in the room making them glow gold. “I’m sorry,” he says softly.

“Why are you sorry?” Mark asks, reciprocating the soft tone. 

There is a hesitant pause. I’m sorry for ignoring you. I’m sorry for barging into your life and making you worry. I’m sorry for being too scared to admit that we’re soulmates. I’m sorry for everything. “I’m sorry for causing a scene and making you take care of me.” He can’t look Mark in the eyes, look at the cause for all of this anger and pain that has been festering in their shared apartment for weeks now, instead choosing to look at the water in his hands.

“Donghyuck…,” Mark sighs. “You don’t have to apologize for having a panic attack. That’s not something you can control. Don’t ever think that it bothers me to help you. I’m more than happy to. Even though we aren’t that close, we’re still roommates.”

“Hyuck.”

Mark makes a confused expression. “What?”

“You can call me Hyuck,” Donghyuck says nervously, “If you want. All of my friends call me Hyuck so… you can too if you want.”

Mark’s smile is blinding. “Hyuck,” he tries out. “I like it. It suits you.”

Donghyuck’s smile is soft. “Don’t go getting cheesy on me Mark Lee. Like you said, we barely know each other so I can revoke that permission at any time,” he says with his normal sass and teasing tone.

“Let’s change that,” Mark insists. He turns all the way in his spot on the couch to face Donghyuck fully and holds out his hand in the space between them. “Hi my name is Mark Lee, I’m obsessed with watermelon, I love music, and I was born in ’99.”

Donghyuck laughs, “What are you doing you weirdo?”

“Hey! Play along!” Mark whines.

“Okay, okay," Donghyuck concedes while putting his hand in Marks to shake it. “My name is Lee Donghyuck, hmm, let me think… I love to perform, my spirit animal is a pudu, and I was born in 2000. Happy?”

Mark nods enthusiastically, “Yes, very!”

They sit like that for a moment, hand in hand, staring into each other’s eyes without saying anything. When the air becomes too thick and Mark can feel the tension floating between them he speaks up. “So does this mean…? Are you…? Are we… soulmates?”

‘I…,” Donghyuck starts but then closes his mouth, unsure of what to say. “I think so. I wasn’t sure at first, but… after looking at you’re eyes up close again there’s no denying it.”

“What do you mean?” Marks asks.

Hyuck smiles at the childlike curiosity of the other boy. “Your eyes. They’re the most beautiful shade of brown I’ve ever seen. At first, I convinced myself that they were just a weird shade of black, like everything else in my life. But then I saw them up close on the day I moved in - when we almost collided in the kitchen - and I just knew.”

“Knew what?”

“That you had to be my soulmate. Because nothing in this world had ever been more than muddled, cold gray until I looked into your eyes and saw warmth.” 

Mark didn’t know what to say so he just sat there and smiled down into his lap, focusing on the soothing weight of Hyuck's hand in his.

“What-” Hyuck starts, but pauses in hesitation, unsure if he’s ready for an answer to the question he’s been worrying over for weeks now. “What did you mean earlier… about me… and the sun?”

Mark lifts his head and gives Hyuck’s hand a squeeze. “My whole life, I’ve lived in mostly darkness with only hints of light every now and then, but when I first locked eyes with you, it was like I was staring into the sun. I had never seen something so bright and constant, anywhere before.”

Hyuck leans forward slightly, still confused. “But I thought you were blind.” Hyuck realizes what he said and softens his voice, “I’m sorry if this is rude, I don’t know much about this topic and I’m a little confused.”

“It’s okay,” Mark responds with a soft smile. “You can ask questions.”

“So you can still see light. Sometimes. Does this mean there are different… types… of blindness? I thought if you were blind then you just couldn’t see anything, that it was just dark and nothing.”

Marks nods his head, “Yeah it’s, almost like a spectrum, like some people can see shapes and some people can see light and some people can’t see anything. Most of my vision is just various shapes and shades of dark blobs but every now and then when something is really bright, it looks lighter than the rest. Especially with things like sequence and glitter!”

Donghyuck just nods, the gears in his head turning, trying to make sense of the situation. “Oh okay…”

Mark can feel the hesitation coming off the boy in from of him. He squeezes the younger boy’s hand again, trying to comfort him in some way. He’s not sure what’s bothering him but he wants to help him if he can. “What’s bothering you, Hyuck?”

The sound of the nickname on his soulmate’s lips is like a trigger in his heart that sends butterflies soaring through his stomach and he starts to fidget in his spot on the couch. “It’s just… I thought… It’s stupid.” He sighs and looks into Mark’s eyes, steeling himself for the anger he’s assuming will come towards him soon. “I made a rash judgment when we first met and thought that, because you were blind, you wouldn’t be able to tell you were my soulmate.”

They both pause at the confession, letting it ring through the space between them. But the anger didn’t come.

“To be honest,” Mark starts, “until I met you, I didn’t think that I even had a soulmate. I thought that because I couldn’t even see the grays, I was a lost cause. Hell, I can’t even see my own brother, how was I supposed to look at my soulmate and have the world burst into colors. It just seemed… impossible.”

“And now?” Hyuck asks softly.

“And now,” Mark smiles, “I know that I was wrong.”

Hyuck’s tentative smile brightens and his light gets a little brighter in Mark’s eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I hope you enjoyed the update! I can either leave it here or keep going - I want to expand on Jaemin and Renjun's soulmate bond but I don't know if it should be a spinoff or if I should just continue it in this story. Let me know what you think in the comments!


End file.
